


Insane Spike Logic

by elisi



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: F/M, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-11-26
Updated: 2009-11-25
Packaged: 2017-10-03 18:37:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21022
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elisi/pseuds/elisi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>S2 silliness.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

"Y'know - I miss Spike!"

Willow belatedly realised that Buffy was speaking and looked up, her face resembling a question mark. "You miss - _what_?"

Buffy, who had been idly flicking through a magazine, sighed and threw it on the floor where it joined a growing heap of junk. Sleepovers were not good for tidiness. "Well, Spike was kinda fun to fight - straight up evil, no beating about the bush! Angelus is just so... mean."

Her voice trailed off sadly, and Willow nodded although she didn't quite understand what Buffy was going on about. Buffy obviously noticed, because she tried to explain better: "Well, Spike wouldn't have killed your goldfish or left me flowers and stuff. I was just thinking -" she stopped, but now Willow was interested: "Thinking what? Go on, this is what sleepovers are supposed to be for - sharing secrets and talking about boys... or, in our case, werewolves and vampires."

Buffy absentmindedly picked at her newly applied nail polish, and then gave in: "Ok, I was thinking, that if it'd been Spike who had a soul and I'd been dating him - not that I would, 'cause y'know _totally_ not my type, the hair alone is enough to put anyone of, although the coat was kinda nice in a retro sorta way..." She frowned. "What was I saying?"

"If you'd been dating Spike?" Willow offered.

"Oh, yeah. Well, if he'd then lost his soul, he'd just be all 'Ha, ha, I'm evil again and I'm so gonna kill you Slayer!' None of those games that Angelus keeps playing." She sighed. "Spike was nicely straight-forward. Angelus is all mysterious."

Willow thought for a moment. "But that's what you liked about Angel, right? That mysterious thing?"

"Yeah..."

\-------

Outside, under Buffy's window, a shadow was listening intently. "Interesting..." he murmured to himself, as he threw his cigarette into the bushes and walked off, a small smile on his lips.


	2. Chapter 2

"Slayer!"

Buffy nearly jumped out of her skin. The guy was supposed to be stuck in a wheelchair, not to suddenly pop up like an evil jack-in-the-box when she was patrolling.

"Spike? What are you doing here? Last I knew you were cripple-boy!"

He chuckled. "Well, I got tired of Dru feeding me puppies, so I decided to go for a stroll!"

Buffy felt like smacking her head against a wall. No actually, she felt like smacking **his** head against a wall: "No, but... I knocked you out and then an organ fell on top of you. A... And there was fire!"

"Well, I got better. Demon here, remember? Supernatural healing." He took a drag of his cigarette: "Now listen - I have an idea!"

"So do I! I'll stake you, and make sure I do it right this time!" She held up her stake, making sure he knew she wasn't making idle threats.

"Aw, but I thought you missed me?" he said, mock concern in his voice. "I'm fun to fight, right? Straightforward evil?" He tried to look innocent, but couldn't really pull it off.

Buffy's jaw dropped. "You were spying on me!"

Spike grinned. "That I was. Heard some interesting things too. But you see, it got me thinking... now you slept with the mighty broody one, and he turned all nasty on you. So I thought it'd be fun to see if it'd work in reverse! You sleep with me, and maybe I'll wake up with a soul, desperate to redeem myself and willin' to be your new little hunnybunny! What do you say?"

Buffy had been listening with ever increasing disbelief. "You're insane!" she finally ventured, trying to block sudden thoughts of what Spike might be like in bed.

He shrugged. "Ah, well, suit yourself. Just figured that since he's shagging my bird, I could do his!" He then looked her straight in the eyes and titled his head slightly, his voice practically a purr: "And if you let me, I could show you a very good time... for a start I don't need to breathe!"

And his eyes trailed slowly and appreciatively down her body.

Her brain took a while to work out what he meant, but then she blushed and completely forgot what she was going to say. While she was still trying to regain her composure, Spike slipped away into the shadows with a smile and a wink, leaving Buffy very confused and wondering how she could ever have thought him 'straightforward'.


End file.
